One of the best pieces of advice I got when I first got married was: “Treat socks as disposable.”
This advice worked well for years for me. I did not get upset when our socks wore out or got lost and it gave me permission to purge orphaned socks on a regular basis.
Then my youngest daughter became obsessed with high quality socks and the obsession spread to the rest of the family. I am now willing to spend more for a good pair of socks than almost any other article of clothing. This is because I am extremely frugal and buy most of my clothes at consignment shops or on clearance.
As the cost of our socks increased, I became less willing to treat them as disposable and became frustrated when expensive socks would wear out quickly or get lost. I have had a couple pair of Darn Tough socks that are over a decade old that I wear several times a week. And Darn Tough offers a life-time warranty on their socks. Now, I only buy Darn Tough socks.
This was a complete shift from how I thought about socks. I am willing to pay a lot of money for comfortable, long-lasting socks.
As our socks have become more permanent, I am now faced with the dilemma of what to do when a single sock goes missing. I just realized that I could easily get rid of my frustration if I gave up on the idea that our socks need to match.
When our attitude about something changes, a behavioral shift is imminent. It’s harder to “live and let go” when you are putting more time, effort or money into something. Rather than dwelling on a problem you can’t fix (like finding a missing sock), get creative with how you face the dilemma and allow yourself grace in the process.
How do you think about socks?
I did something similar! When socks were lost less frequently in my house, I started to buy better quality socks. Then the ‘what to do when one is missing’ problem occured, I thought I could simply buy all the same color and style then it didn’t matter. But even I swiftly got bored of that! I now vary the color and style but have embraced the miss matched look. It makes me smile, and gives me a little creativity to play with. I too am frugal, but I decided to give myself a little flexibly. This sounds pretty trivial but in a frugal household felt like a big deal. It’s nice to hear others think about these things too.
Love it! And you can look down at your socks whenever you need a boost.
Expectation violation! Such a common problem. I love reading about how people have rescued their happiness by changing their viewpoint.
At my former employer, there was a middle eastern lunch truck that had the most amazing food… but they always got something wrong with my order, and I’d try harder to get my order across next time. I went less often, and I enjoyed what I got less and less. Eventually I realized that, if I wanted to keep enjoying what they offered, I had to give up my expectations of what they were going to deliver.
I walked up, had a little small talk time with the vendor, and asked him for “one lunch please.” After we got over the awkwardness of negotiating what I meant – “I’ll take anything you want to give me, let me know the price” – they rattled off what they were going to serve (generally off-menu). And I enjoyed fantastic lunches that way a few times a week for a long time.
Very nice!
I totally agree with this. One of the most freeing thing I did once (this will shock the expensive or custom socks folks) is I threw away my entire sock drawer and bought two packages of comfortable socks – all the same. Yep. No more wasted time with matching or looking for missing sock pairs. In the morning, any two will do. In the wash.. you get what you get. Haha. Every few years when they wear out… toss the whole drawer. It really didn’t cost that much and it’s one area of my life that is very easy now. Hahah. Not for everyone, but that’s my story!