Author: Becky Nesbitt

Make It a Debate, Not an Argument

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Have you ever been paging through an article and stumble across a quote that just stops you in your tracks? Here’s one attributed to Adlai Stevenson that recently caught my eye. Stevenson was talking about political campaigns, but I think the idea can be applied to many situations. He said that the challenge was to not just win, but to win “without proving that you are unworthy of winning.” I think that sentiment speaks to integrity, grace, and fair-mindedness.

Recently some of my colleagues and I were at a retreat, sharing information about helping facilitators manage decision making and conflict in groups. I realized that Stevenson’s sentiment can also be applied to helping groups make decisions.

discussionOne of the trickiest situations for a facilitator can be encountering and effectively handling disagreements among group participants. Making decisions in groups is difficult and often messy, but helping a group make complex decisions is one of the most important tasks of a facilitator. The lively discussion that is part of the group decision making process, however, often involves people who feel passionately about their ideas, and sometimes that passion can escalate to a discourse that is unhelpful at best, and can often be damaging to the group or individuals involved.

The facilitator’s job is to create an environment where sharing a diversity of ideas is viewed as an important part of the process to create stronger, more sustainable solutions. In Facilitation at a Glance, a handy field guide to facilitation, the author, Ingrid Bens, highlights two different kinds of discussions that can occur among group members.

Bens describes productive disagreements as debates. In this type of conversation, individuals are open to the ideas of others – even when they may be different from their own. Everyone strives to understand the views and perspectives of the other group members, and remains objective and focused on the facts.

Arguments, on the other hand, are a type of discussion that is often unproductive, and may damage relationships and group momentum. According to Bens, in an argument, people assume they’re right and are often not really listening to the ideas of others. The discourse often results in personal attacks or blaming.

So how can a facilitator encourage a debate (and discourage an argument)? Bens suggests that a facilitator:

  • remain neutral,
  • restate differences so they can be understood,
  • highlight areas of agreement,
  • encourage folks to focus on the facts (not emotions or assumptions),
  • Teamworkslow down the discussion by encouraging individuals to paraphrase what they are hearing each other say and allowing only one person to speak at a time.

Creating shared agreements can help groups reach the finish line with their integrity and friendships intact. When it comes to group decision making, debates that lead to compromise and collaboration are essential to helping group members be worthy of their win.

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Becky NesbittBecky Nesbitt is an Assistant Professor and Extension Educator in Community Development with OSU Extension.  For more information about Becky and her educational efforts, visit here.

Doing and dreaming: A good plan makes a space for both

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“Tones sound, and roar and storm about me until I have set them down in notes.” You might be wondering what this quote from Ludwig van Beethoven has to do with community development.  What I hear in the musical master’s words is the process of creating order from chaos; he is crafting incredible harmony from a storm of strong, independent, unconnected notes. To me, that’s an analogy for good planning – strategic planning.

In fact, developing and implementing a good strategic plan can help an organization take control of the chaos and set itself on a path of identifying and achieving its goals. In addition to goals, most successful plans have a few common elements, including a vision and a mission.

Why does an organization need both a mission and a vision? Aren’t they really the same thing? Well, no, they’re not – and they’re both an important part of successful planning and work.

North Star

All the stars of the northern sky appear to rotate around the North Star.

A mission is a concise statement that explains why the organization exists, answering some basic questions: What do we do? Who do we serve? How does that improve things? Tapping into the passion of the employees, volunteers, and partners, a mission statement reflects why this organization and its work is important. Much like the North Star, a mission statement is always visible, allowing the people of the organization to continually realign themselves to remain on the right path. A mission statement expresses the work that the organization is doing today.

A vision is less about doing and more about dreaming. Vision statements outline the desired future, as expressed by the organization. Possibilities, hopes, innovations – these are the lifeblood of vision statements. A vision should be aspirational and reflect a world that is possible (by the good and successful work of the organization) in the future.

Here’s another way to consider mission and vision statements. Think of a missionary. The work of a missionary is immediate, on the ground, working directly with people and communities to improve their situations. The missionary knows his/her purpose and is directing energy into achieving that objective. Conversely, a visionary is someone who focuses on the future –envisioning what could be. While a visionary is aware of the current situation, he/she is contemplating the best-case possibilities that may exist in the future.

Does your organization have some chaos it would like to tame? OSU Extension has skilled facilitators to help your team create a strategic plan that has its feet firmly in the present and its eyes focused on a hopeful future. For more information, visit go.osu.edu/seekexcellence.

Becky Nesbitt is an Assistant Professor and Extension Educator in Community Development with OSU Extension.

Cleveland’s Greatest Gift

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What comes to mind when you think of Cleveland, Ohio? Perhaps you know that it’s home to the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame and the 2016 NBA champion Cleveland Cavaliers. Maybe you’re familiar with the city’s rich legacy of business development, such as John D. Rockefeller’s establishment of Standard Oil in Cleveland in 1870. While the cultural and business accomplishments of this beautiful Midwestern city are impressive, Cleveland is also the birthplace to what may be one of the greatest gifts to the civilized world – and it all began with an inspired idea.

Cleveland as seen from Cleveland Metroparks Whiskey Island

More than 100 years ago, Frederick H. Goff, a successful lawyer and banker, envisioned an organization that would focus on developing Cleveland’s community by pulling together and harnessing the resources – the wealth – of the city’s philanthropists. That idea grew into the world’s first community foundation: The Cleveland Foundation. Within five years, Goff’s strategic idea inspired other cities, such as Chicago, Boston and Minneapolis, to establish their own community foundations. But the first – in the world – was born in Cleveland!

Today the Cleveland Foundation serves not only Cleveland, but counties nearby as well. With nearly $2 billion in assets, the organization has touched millions of lives by providing funding and by partnering with other organizations to strengthen the region’s schools and neighborhoods, health and wellness activities, cultural endeavors, and economic development.

Merwin’s Wharf in the Flats – Owned and operated by Cleveland Metroparks

One of the recipients of the many grants and scholarships offered through the foundation is the Cleveland Metroparks. This expansive area encompassing more than 23,000 acres includes 300 miles of trails, eight golf courses, eight lakefront parks, and the Cleveland Zoo. The Metroparks offers a myriad of outdoor activities focusing on education, recreation, conservation and sustainability – all within and surrounding this bustling, revitalized city. Perched on the southern shore of Lake Erie, the Metroparks provide urban residents and visitors opportunities for hiking, biking, kayaking, fishing (and ice fishing – Cleveland is a northern city, after all), dining, sledding, horseback riding, paddle boarding, swimming, and much more. This park system is funded by a variety of donations and grants, and presents tangible evidence of Frederick Goff’s idea to harness the wealth of the community for the benefit of all.

Cleveland Metroparks – Edgewater Park

Today, community foundations find ways to tap into the generosity of individuals from all economic levels. If it’s not in your budget to donate money to a charity of your choice, think about offering your time or expertise to help with their community outreach efforts. Winston Churchill said, “We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give.” What an incredible gift Frederick Goff has given to the world – the idea that lying deep within the seed of generosity we plant today is the promise of a better tomorrow.

To learn more about OSU Extension’s educational programs focused on community development, visit go.osu.edu/seekexcellence.

 

Becky Nesbitt is an Assistant Professor and Extension Educator in Community Development with OSU Extension.

Unleashing the Power of Group Wisdom

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Why is it so difficult to make good decisions in groups? We know that the benefits of group decision-making are substantial: better thinking, more viable and sustainable action plans, a stronger sense of ownership for achieving a desired outcome. In fact, when done properly, group decision-making may be our best hope for solving difficult, complex issues. Unfortunately, group discussions often result in decisions that lack imagination, thoughtful consideration, or inclusiveness.

group discussionsSo why do smart, well-intentioned people often struggle with making good decisions in groups? According to Sam Kaner, author of Facilitator’s Guide to Participatory Decision-Making, “the answer is deeply rooted in prevailing cultural values that make it difficult for people to actually think in groups.” Kaner explains that some of the obstacles to productive group interactions include a lack of good listening skills, a strong need to move to action without adequate consideration or discussion, and treating a difference of opinion as conflict that must be “stifled or solved.”

To move beyond these typical issues, Kaner suggests that groups employ a facilitator, a neutral third party who can help the group members do their best thinking. Good facilitators, he explains, “strengthen the effectiveness of the group of people who are there to get work done.” The facilitator “helps, serves, teaches, and guides,” while the group members themselves “resolve, decide, produce and act.” Good facilitators understand group dynamics, and value the process of group decision-making. They use their skills to help group members tap into their own collective wisdom.

group decisionsA facilitator can help a group move beyond the familiar, often unproductive, patterns of communication, and encourages a sense of shared responsibility, empowering group members to speak up, listen, and effectively participate in the process. According to Kaner, the group facilitator’s three core competencies include:

  • Building and sustaining a respectful, supportive atmosphere
  • Managing the process, but allowing the group to direct the content of the discussion
  • Teaching the group members new thinking skills to help build their capacity for collaboration

Are you interested in strengthening your facilitation skills? Contact Becky Nesbitt at nesbitt.21@osu.edu to learn more about OSU Extension’s facilitation training. For more info, visit the CD webpage.

Seek Excellence logoBecky Nesbitt is an Assistant Professor and Extension Educator in Community Development with OSU Extension. 

The power of a single snowflake

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We journeyed north to Alaska for our family vacation this year. And as odd as it might sound, while in that remote, spectacular, unspoiled wilderness, I couldn’t help but think about the concept of community.

Glacier Bay National Park in Alaska. Credit: Becky Nesbitt

Glacier Bay National Park, Alaska. Credit: Becky Nesbitt

I see myself as a lifelong student, so when I’m interested in something, I want to learn more about it. As we were traveling past the ice fields and across the Aleutian and Alaska mountain ranges, I was reading about the early explorers who made their way into that part of the world. John Muir, a 19th Century author and naturalist, was one of the first non-native souls who trekked into that frozen, unforgiving place.

As Muir hiked over and around the tallest, snow-capped peaks in North America and gazed into the turquoise blue depths of massive glaciers, he marveled at the powerful forces of nature. And in those moments, when the only sounds ringing in his ears may have been humpback whales breaking the surface of the water or the wind whistling through the Western hemlocks, I think he was thinking about community too.

Glacier Bay National Park in Alaska. Credit: Becky Nesbitt

Glacier Bay National Park, Alaska. Credit: Becky Nesbitt

While canoeing near glaciers in what is now Glacier Bay National Park, Muir wrote that he began to think about how those massive bodies of ice were formed from delicate snowflakes. He observed that a single snowflake, on its own, is fragile and powerless; but many snowflakes, gathered together, over time, formed a glacier. And those slow-moving rivers of ice carved mountains, created deep valleys, and gave birth to breathtaking fjords and great fresh water lakes.

As I was reading about his adventures, I thought about how a person, alone in that unfriendly wilderness, was a bit like a snowflake. Individually, of course, a person can have much more impact than one snowflake, but when one person becomes two or three or more, a “community” is born. Helen Keller remarked, “Alone we can do so little; together we can do so much.” People seem to be at their best when they work together, gathering around a shared goal or living peacefully in a common area. When we live and work together, we must face our similarities and our differences; we must harness our strengths – allowing each person to contribute an individual effort to a combined outcome. Just like those snowflakes within a glacier, each of us can be one part of collective force that might one-day move mountains.

To learn more about OSU Extension’s educational programs focused on community development, visit go.osu.edu/seekexcellence.

Becky Nesbitt is an Assistant Professor and Extension Educator in Community Development with OSU Extension.

A matter of trust

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What would you say is the most important element of any relationship? Good communication? Accountability? Honesty? Or are these characteristics and behaviors part of something larger, something much more fundamental? Perhaps, the most important thing, the bedrock that supports the foundation of all relationships, is trust.

Trust 2016-06-09Countless scholars, experts and ordinary folks throughout history have touted the importance of building and maintaining trust. Noted educator and author, the late Dr. Stephen R. Covey, often wrote about its importance to relationship building. “Trust is the glue of life. It’s the most essential ingredient in effective communication. It’s the foundational principle that holds all relationships.” Covey continues, “When the trust account is high, communication is easy, instant, and effective.” When individuals trust each other, they have empathy for one another, forgive easily, and give each other the benefit of the doubt.

Unfortunately, trust is one of those gifts that can be easily taken for granted. Trust is built over time, when intentions, words and actions align. Yet like a dry forest in the path of a raging wildfire, it can be destroyed in just a moment, damaging relationships, undermining teams, and negatively affecting performance and satisfaction.

So, how can we be sure that our intentions, words and actions are in alignment? We can refer to the “4 Cores of Credibility” outlined by Covey’s son, Stephen M.R. Covey, in the book The speed of trust: The one thing that changes everything:

  • Integrity – being open and honest; keeping commitments; and standing for your beliefs
  • Intent – examining and refining your motivations; declaring your intent; and choosing win-win solutions
  • Capabilities – identifying your strengths and then continuing to develop and leverage those in a spirit of lifelong learning; creating a path of action by setting and working on goals
  • Results – taking responsibility for results; expecting to be successful; learning from mistakes

To learn more about OSU Extension’s educational programs focusing on leadership and organizational development, visit go.osu.edu/seekexcellence.

Becky Nesbitt is an Assistant Professor and Extension Educator in Community Development with OSU Extension. 

Evidence of your passage

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happiness

Happiness…it’s important to Americans – in fact, the unalienable right to search for happiness is touted in the U.S. Declaration of Independence: “…life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.” The document that represents the foundation upon which our country was built, calls out the importance of happiness – now that’s something. I won’t deny that being happy is important, and it sure does feel good, but is it all that matters? Is happiness the goal, or is it a byproduct of something more meaningful?

From the time I was an undergraduate, and heard a political science professor talk about his experience as a young child in a Nazi concentration camp, I’ve been fascinated with the stories of Holocaust survivors. Hundreds of books have been penned by these remarkable people, and a recurring theme among them seems to focus on the survivors’ ability to find meaning, even in the most bleak and horrible situations.

Viktor Frankl, a noted neurologist and psychiatrist, wrote in his memoir, Man’s Search for Meaning, about his experiences at Auschwitz and Dachau. Frankl examines the importance of finding significance, even in unbearable circumstances. He writes that a person who, “knows the why for his existence, will be able to bear almost any how.” Wow, that’s definitely about more than just feeling happy. But Frankl goes on to say that, “Everything can be taken from a man but one thing, the last of the human freedoms – to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances.” Maybe his point is not that we should chase happiness, but that we can choose it – that in our pursuit of meaning, we choose an attitude that allows us to be helpful, grateful and kind – an attitude that opens us to happiness – or at least to a more positive emotional state.

It reminds me of a quote I read recently from Pope John XXIII. He said, “Do not walk through time without leaving worthy evidence of your passage.” Perhaps when we find meaning in our lives, by serving, loving, educating, helping, protecting, enlightening, supporting others, we discover that happiness is not the goal of our existence, but it is the consequence of our actions and our intentions. By pursuing and creating purpose in life, we ready our hearts and minds for the joys – both large and small – that we choose to experience along the way. So, although the pursuit of happiness may be a different journey for every person, our common goal may be a desire for each of us to create a more meaningful passage through time.

Becky Nesbitt is an Assistant Professor and Extension Educator in Community Development with OSU Extension. To learn more about Becky’s educational efforts, visit go.osu.edu/seekexcellence.

Turning the Golden Rule on its head

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Golden Rule 2015-07-30

Treat people the way you want to be treated. It’s the golden rule – or so we’re told. But perhaps a deeper, more effective way to interact with others is to treat them the way they want to be treated. Reading one self-help book or attending a Myers-Briggs workshop will quickly illustrate that people can be motivated by and comfortable with very different things. So, choosing to relate to others only in a way that is comfortable to you, might actually be a bit short-sighted.

A few years ago, I learned this lesson the hard way – by completely blowing it. I was teaching with a respected colleague who has a personality and teaching style that are very different from mine – and I enjoyed that balance when we worked together. For about a year, we met monthly with a difficult group of participants. Most of these folks didn’t seem interested in what we were sharing; however, they were required to attend these classes to receive food vouchers for participating, so they would reluctantly show up for the sessions. We had a new group of participants each time, so it was difficult to build rapport with them. When the class would roll around each month, I found myself dreading the experience, and I knew from our conversations that my colleague felt the same way.

After each class, I would be sure to take time to thank my coworker for her effort. I expressed how grateful I was to have her share her expertise with the group. Since I knew that teaching these classes could be challenging, I wanted to be sure that she knew how much I appreciated her willingness to continue to work with the less-than-friendly participants. I thought that pointing out my continued gratitude would be motivating and would let her know that her efforts were well-appreciated – at least by me.

One afternoon, after about six months of these classes, as I was packing up our materials, I thanked her again for her efforts. She stopped what she was doing, turned to me and said, “You know, you don’t need to thank me each time we come here.” She continued, “And actually when you thank me every time, it makes me feel uncomfortable. I’m just doing my job. I know that you appreciate me, and I really like working with you. So you don’t need to continue to thank me.”

That was such a profound teachable moment for me, and I was very grateful to her for sharing her feelings (although I refrained from expressing my gratitude). Her honest, well-expressed comments helped me realize that I had only been thinking of my own patterns of communication – what I liked and positively responded to. I hadn’t really taken into consideration her personality and how to effectively communicate in a way that resonated with her. In other words, I wasn’t treating her the way she preferred to be treated. While my intentions were good, my execution was all wrong.

Interacting with people in meaningful and fulfilling ways requires us to observe, ask, listen and learn about the folks who fill our lives. The process of relationship building can be complicated, confusing…and wonderful. Connecting with another person involves empathy, understanding and, many times, the need to move outside of our own patterns of behavior, thought or comfort. Opening ourselves to the complexity of others, without judgment, enables us to recognize that while we may have many similar traits, experiences and beliefs, we are indeed individual and unique.

Visit go.osu.edu/seekexcellence to discover the educational programs and resources that can help you and your team learn more about building strong relationships.

(Submitted by Becky Nesbitt, Assistant Professor and Extension Educator, Ohio Valley EERA)

Leave it better than you found it

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It was late and cold, and by that point, I really just wanted to be home on this particular Friday night in October. Instead, I was standing in the field adjacent to the high school football stadium, waiting for my daughter and her fellow band members to finish loading their instruments and uniforms into the band truck. As I saw the final carts rolled onto the vehicle, I expected the band director, an energetic, disciplined young man, enjoying the first few months of his newly minted college degree, to dismiss the group for the evening. Instead, he gathered the kids around him, and then surprisingly dispatched them into the area around the parking lot with the instructions, “Let’s leave this place better than we found it.” The teenagers happily (really, they actually seemed happy) fanned out into the field and returned with their arms full of empty pizza boxes, tattered candy wrappers and half full bottles of Gatorade. They were carrying trash that they didn’t create – garbage that had been carelessly left behind by others who had enjoyed the night’s activities.

Leave it better #2 - 2015-03-05Let’s leave this place better than we found it. I realized that those nine words communicated many of the ideals that I hope to instill in my daughter: respect, service and commitment to something larger than self. Imagine if each of us began every day with that goal in mind. At work, at school, in our communities, our homes, within our groups and families, if we each made the promise, in any way large or small, to leave this place better than we found it.

It’s easy to begin to generate a list of professionals who focus on improving people and situations – folks in the medical field, educators, architects, highway crews, just to name a few. Their “improvements” are often large, measurable and easy to see. But sometimes, the opportunities we have to improve something are more like a nudge than a big transformation. A remarkable teenager, Anne Frank, born generations before my daughter and her band friends, wrote in her diary, “How wonderful it is that nobody need wait a single moment before starting to improve the world.” How wonderful indeed.

Seek Excellence Logo - blogIf you’re looking for a little inspiration and a lot of solid, research-based information to help improve your world, be sure to check out the educational programs and resources offered by OSU Extension’s Community Development professionals at comdev.osu.edu/programs/leadership-development/seek-excellence. We are eager to work with your community, group or business to help you discover ways that you can leave your world better than you found it.

(Submitted by Becky Nesbitt, Assistant Professor and Extension Educator, Ohio Valley EERA)

Teamwork, it’s not rocket science…or is it?

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Have you ever noticed that when we want to illustrate how easy something is, we compare it to rocket science or brain surgery? Ok, it requires years of advanced educational study and hundreds of hours of technical experience to master aerospace engineering or neurological surgery. But, truthfully, the average person will never need to become adept at either of these disciplines. Effectively working on a team and getting along with others – those are skills that are necessary for everyone.  Unfortunately, embracing the abilities needed to be a good team member and build relationships with others is not always easy. In fact, it can be downright difficult – kind of like rocket science…or brain surgery.

Emotional 3In a 2004 article in the journal Psychological Science, J. Richard Hackman contends that effective team members are people who possess the emotional maturity needed for their roles with their teammates. His research shows that fostering emotional maturity is essential; however, it is a trait that tends to be developmental in nature and cannot be readily taught. Well, you’ll get no argument here. In fact, while many institutions of higher learning offer degrees in neurology or engineering, we’ve yet to see a university that offers a degree in emotional maturity.

So what are those elusive (for some folks, anyway) skills that demonstrate emotional maturity, thus enabling a person to be a good team member? Here’s a list of our top three essential teammate traits:

  • Trust – Let’s face it, trust is the foundation of all relationships.  Whether it’s with your spouse, your friends, your coworkers or your hair stylist, if you don’t trust the person, you’re not going to be willing to take the risk of being open, honest, and well, trusting.  For a good team to work, we need to be able to count on each other.  Building trust takes time – and dare we say, it also helps to have face-to-face interactions now and then.  Social media and Skype are wonderful tools to keep in touch, but there’s just something about breathing the same air as someone else, and actually spending time interacting together at the very same GPS coordinate that helps to build a strong, reality-based relationship that goes beyond cute photos and 140 characters of type.
  • Open Communication – Ok, this seems like a no-brainer.  But trying to build a team with a poor communicator can seem like working with a person with no brain.  Good communication skills include the ability to effectively and diplomatically express yourself, while quieting your inner voice (and the one resonating from your face) long enough to listen to and understand another person.  Honesty, tempered with genuine and sincere kindness, help grease the communication gears, preventing resentment and allowing a shared sense of responsibility to grow.
  • Flexibility – Guess what…things don’t always go your way.  Good team members know that compromise and a willingness to adapt to change are essential when working with others.  And honestly, it’s that combination of ideas – that diversity of thought and experience – that really contributes to building a strong product – and a strong team.

So, creating a good, effective and enjoyable team really isn’t rocket science. It’s actually a lot more complicated than that.

If you want to learn more about how we’ve worked to make our team more successful, check out our June 2014 article in the Journal of Extension, joe.org/joe/2014june/iw4.php.

Becky Nesbitt and Rose Fisher Merkowitz, OSU Extension Educators for Community Development, have worked together for many years, building a strong and effective team focused on providing educational materials related to leadership and organizational development. Take a look at the educational programs that Becky and Rose offer at go.osu.edu/seekexcellence.

(Submitted by Becky Nesbitt, Assistant Professor and Extension Educator, Ohio Valley EERA, and Rose Fisher Merkowitz, Associate Professor and Extension Educator, Miami Valley EERA.)