My Step Project consisted of an online synchronous 2D Animation course, which covered the basics of 2D animation and involved feedback from an experienced mentor. It also included an online synchronous composition bootcamp, which involved discussion and teaching of composition principles and ideas in the lens of creating pictures. Lastly, my project involved an online asynchronous character design course.

A new understanding I gained was that I realized that doing new things, although not necessarily easy, get better with practice. Even though I knew this going into the project, I internalized this concept when working on the animation assignments every week for the 2D Animation course. As the weeks progressed, the assignments got harder and more complex. However, I realized that even though the quality of my work improved, the time I spent was staying about the same. I was getting more familiar with the tools and techniques and I was able to work more effectively. This very noticeable aspect of my workload compared to time spent has helped me feel less daunted when faced with doing something new. Being able to observe myself improving so quickly has helped my mentality when going outside of my comfort zone.

The most important activities that led to my transformation was the weekly animation assignments that I did as part of the Intro to 2D Animation Course. The assignments started out very simple and very specific. This was to help us get used to our tools and concepts and find a good workflow.

The first assignment was to animate a bouncing ball that bounces five times on screen, entering from one side and leaving from the other. I spent about eight or nine hours working on it. A lot of this time involved figuring out what to do and how to best work on the assignment. The assignment was frustrating. It was a simple and straightforward task, yet when I played it back, the animation did not feel right. Feedback from my peers and my mentor were very helpful though and with some adjustments, I was able to greatly improve the first assignment.

The second assignment involved animation two bouncing balls of differing weights colliding with each other. Despite the extra workload, complexity, and open-endedness, I noticed that I actually completed the second assignment faster than the first, in around seven hours. This was when I realized just how much I had improved and gotten more comfortable in the span of a single week.

The third and fourth assignments involved animating a flour sack: creating the illusion of life, then expressing emotion respectively. These provided extra complexity in brainstorming ideas, maintaining consistent volume, and animating three-dimensional looking objects. Despite these added obstacles, I also finished them in around nine or ten hours each.

Although assignment five, the head turn, was vastly more complex and open to interpretation, and I also ended up spending much more time working on the assignment, the results were very clear in my head. From week 1 to week 6, even though the assignments gradually amped up in difficulty and intricacy, I was able to keep up and excel in class.

This change is valuable for my life because it acts as another keystone that I can look back on to prove to myself that I can tackle new tasks that seem daunting and scary. I will not say that I am now impervious in the face of any new and uncomfortable experiences, but I am confident saying that I am significantly less apprehensive when facing unfamiliar ordeals in the future.

My STEP signature project was taking a class to become a State Tested Nursing Assistant. I had to attend online lectures and go to in-person skills labs to learn the skills in a hands-on fashion. The last two days of classes were clinical days, in which we went to a nursing home for 8 hours each day and cared for actual residents there and practiced the skills that we were taught in lecture and lab.

Over the summer, I started a job as a temporary STNA in my hometown. I took the class after working at the nursing home for three months, so I had a good sense of what the class would entail. However, I feel that the class gave me a better understanding of the mental and emotional ways that a STNA can impact a resident’s life. I learned more about what the residents go through at this time and that they may have a lot of stressors in their lives that I can help alleviate. I also learned the importance of dignity and respect while giving care. While I do feel that I was practicing these things subconsciously at my former job, it was very insightful to learn of the actual descriptions of my residents and understand why they think or act the way they do. 

In the span of the two week class, I had many transformational moments and interactions. For example, my clinical and lab instructor was very knowledgeable about caring for residents and she stated a lot of things that contradicted what I had been taught at my previous job. I began to learn that different facilities adapt to their residents in different ways and one always has to be willing to change their ways while taking care of different people. At my job this summer, many of the residents were there only for rehabilitation after an injury and were in generally good spirits because there was an end date to their stay at the facility. At clinicals, I came across many individuals that were in long-term care, meaning that the facility would be their forever home. I saw why my lab instructor made it known that these residents need a lot more attention and help with daily activities because they are very ill or have mental health issues that need to be checked in on often. While this area of practice takes more of a toll on the STNA, it is crucial that we know how to deal with these situations and it is very fulfilling to know what a big impact one can make.

One relationship I had that was very inspiring was with my lab and clinical instructor. She had been an aide previously, then went back to school to become a registered nurse. After working as a nurse for a few years, she decided that she had a passion for teaching and started to teach STNA classes. She was so knowledgeable and had an answer for every question I had. She was approachable and I told her all about the job I had this summer and talked about the different places we’ve worked at and how different a STNA’s job can be depending on the people and place. Overall, she made me realize that there are many different places to work and things to do in healthcare that one can always be satisfied with the job they have and leave work everyday feeling that they made a difference.

I also met many different people that were taking the class with me. I realized that this job is very diverse and there were some people in my class that didn’t have English as their first language and still had the courage to go through with the class. I realized that people from any background or group can become a STNA if they have a passion for it. It truly is the most rewarding job I’ve ever had and I can’t wait to pursue it further with my state certification.

The transformation from this class and transitioning into the role of this job has been the most impactful in my life thus far. I realized for the first time that I really did make the right decision to go into the medical field. When I started college, I felt as if I was going through the motions and I just chose the thing that I thought would interest me most. After having this job, I know now that I will make a great doctor someday and enjoy every moment of it. I am always asking the nurses about the resident’s treatments and conditions trying to learn more about the healthcare field and I can’t wait to be more educated someday and start my career. Most importantly, I feel that the empathy and compassion needed to have this job fits me so well. I leave everyday knowing that I took good care of the people and it rarely feels like a job; more like a mutually beneficial relationship. This experience has really changed me for the better and made me so grateful for the life and job I have.

This Summer, I completed my STEP Signature Project where I partook in a seven-week virtual stand-up comedy course at the Manhattan Comedy School in New York City. At the end of the course, I was able to travel to New York City and perform stand-up live at Gotham Comedy Club. Prior to this experience, I believed that being successful in life was synonymous with having a respected and lucrative career. With the other aspects of your life such as your personal happiness and relationships revolving around the career you attain. Reflecting on this experience, I have learned that having a “successful” life is not as not synonymous with your career, but instead your own happiness. 

I realize that this realization is unoriginal and almost trivial in nature. But when you are constantly pitted against your peers for a spot in the future job market, your future career is the focus of your time. I came to college with one goal in mind: putting myself on the best track to becoming a private attorney. I saw my time at Ohio State as a means to an end. Going through the motions of the undergraduate experience so that I could attain a Bachelor’s Degree and be a competitive candidate for law schools. Not really caring for the experiences, people, or my own happiness since it was seemingly all irrelevant to my future goal. But it was actually the experiences I had and the friendships I made during my sophomore year that allowed me to realize I was unhappy pursuing this goal. It was my friends who gave my life value, more so than any career I could have hoped to attain. 

Throughout my Signature STEP Project, there were various interactions and experiences that showed me people leading successful lives, most of which did not have robust salaries. The first being my seven-week virtual comedy course. I was not sure what to expect as to who else would be taking the class. I assumed it would be people in their twenties who were pursuing stand-up or acting as a career. Out of the seventeen people taking the course, that was two of them. The remainder of the students were made up of plumbers, working moms, wolves of Wall Street, and a former professional wrestler. All of the students lived in the New York or Tri-State area, with the exception of myself, and an aspiring actor named Joel who resided in Los Angeles. Although I only got weekly three-hour glimpses into their lives, from what I could tell, they were happy and “successful” financially.   

Some were very wealthy, living luxurious lives in the upper west side of Manhattan. But most were working or middle class with blue-collar jobs who enrolled in the class just for fun. Week after week, I got to hear the comedic bits they had prepared for the class. Bits about quitting their fifth job on Wall Street, children pooping on the floor, and the exhaustion associated with managing your husband’s Bumble account… While each person in the class was a very different walk of life from the next, everyone was able to make a living and experience joy within their lives.  

Throughout the course, I got to know two students outside of class, Joel and Jonathan, while workshopping jokes. I originally reached out to Jonathan for networking purposes because of his job at a white-shoe law firm and his two degrees from Harvard University. But instead of a surface-level, networking relationship, Jonathan and I formed a valuable friendship. He opened up to me about how unhappy he was and how he would do everything in his power to convince me not to go to law school… Eventually, we befriended Joel from the class and invited him to workshop jokes with us.  Joel was the exact opposite of Jonathan- living in Los Angeles and working as a waiter in hopes of making it as an actor. While his life was not glamorous and he lived off a modest income, Joel’s radiance when he spoke about acting and his life was clear. Talking to Joel showed me the value of doing what makes you happy, even if it is not “respectable” or lucrative. 

Beyond individual conversations, it was seeing a comedy show that further solidified the idea that there are many ways to lead a successful life. On my last night in the city, I was able to see a New Talent Show at Gotham. A New Talent Show, unlike the Graduation Show I performed in the day prior, is meant specifically for on the rise comedians seeking management and representation. The comedians that performed that night were seasoned and astonishing to watch. But what was more astonishing was the fact that most of them were not pursuing comedy full-time. There was an anesthesiologist, a grade-school teacher, two single moms, and even a CEO of a large frozen yogurt franchise. All of which pursued comedy on top of their career or occupation. While some were trying to become famous, others simply pursued comedy because they enjoyed it and were good enough to perform at a professional level.  

I write this reflection now having less of an idea of what I am going to be doing after my time at Ohio State. I no longer want to attend law school, at least right out of undergrad, and I am not sure as to how big of a role comedy will be in my life. But I write this reflection, not panicking that my life plan is falling apart, but happy that I can spend time pursuing things that make me happy. I see the value in hobbies that do not directly relate to your future career and the importance of spending time with those who care about you. I see the value of getting to know others rather than using them or the experiences you live as a means to an end. Overall, I now see the value of being happy.  

While I may have less of a “life plan” now than when I started this project, I now know how I am going to plan life going forward. Certainly working hard at the conventional things that matter such as school and any job I may attain. But also working hard to find and pursue the things that make me happy. Such as life-long friendships and stand-up comedy. 

1. Please provide a brief description of your STEP Signature Project. Write two or three sentences describing the main activities your STEP Signature Project entailed.

In my STEP project I learned how to sew in a “learn how to sew in a weekend” class and then took private sewing lessons to work on a collection of upcycled clothes. My project was themed around upcycling and supporting slow fashion. In addition, I learned some astonishing facts about the harm fast fashion does on the environment. To showcase my project, I modeled the upcycled clothes and I made a YouTube video to highlight my project.

2. What about your understanding of yourself, your assumptions, or your view of the world changed/transformed while completing your STEP Signature Project? Write one or two paragraphs to describe the change or transformation that took place.

Two huge transformations occurred while completing my STEP project- of me and my view of the world.
Now, I can look at old clothes and think, “Oh, this just needs a couple tweaks, but it has so much potential”. So, I would say it definitely brought out my creative side that was not being used before. Secondly, learning how to sew has been a huge goal of mine for a long time. I even asked for a sewing machine before I knew about this project and before I knew how to sew. Becoming a better sewer makes me so proud of myself and shows that I can accomplish anything I put my attention and time into.

This project also transformed my view of the world. I think the fashion industry has been slipping past us. They have been creating huge damage and harm and most people don’t think twice about it. It is so normal to buy clothes that are made in sweat shops in horrible conditions and in countries that have little to no environmental regulations on pollution. I learned that more privileged people need to check their consumption-especially if they can afford to.

3. What events, interactions, relationships, or activities during your STEP Signature Project led to the change/transformation that you discussed in #2, and how did those affect you? Write three or four paragraphs describing the key aspects of your experiences completing your STEP Signature Project that led to this change/transformation.
My interactions with Dru Thompson, who was my sewing mentor helped me reach my goal of learning how to sew. I learned all the fundamentals of sewing in her Weekend Warrior class, in which I made a shirt from fabric over two days. I learned how to read and use a pattern, which is extremely useful for sewing from scratch. I learned how to use my machine and other techniques that are useful for completing a sewing project, including hand stitching. In my individual private lessons with Dru, she helped my dreams of upcycling become reality. I learned about the design process and looked at other peoples’ upcycling projects on Pinterest. I pinned my favorite looks. I got to express my unique style by thrifting for clothing with patterns and textures I thought were especially cool. Dru helped me put my ideas into physicality by giving me very thorough instructions and by checking my work. Dru’s creativeness has definitely rubbed off on me. My interactions with Dru has definitely made me a more creative and inventive person.
Additionally, my research on the environmental destruction from the fast industry has made me question the way we are socialized. I don’t understand how things that are so horrible, can be overlooked and normalized. Everyone knows about fast fashion. We are so removed from the entire process because we aren’t living in the countries that get all of the pollutants dumped into their water and chemicals released into their air. The cheapness of these items do not account for the amount of damage they cause to the Earth.

Another unexpected change that happened to me in my STEP project is I gained a friend. In my Weekend Warrior class in Cleveland, there were three other girls in the class, that all came from different backgrounds than me. Ra, one of the girls, and I went out to lunch to Siam Café in Cleveland during our lunch break. We got to chat and get to know each other. I was nervous to go to the class alone, but by getting over my fears, I got to learn the valuable skill of sewing and also got to make a new friend-which is awesome.

4. Why is this change/transformation significant or valuable for your life? Write one or two paragraphs discussing why this change or development matters and/or relates to your academic, personal, and/or professional goals and future plans.

This change and transformation has helped me so much. As mentioned earlier, by accomplishing this goal it has raised my confidence in myself. Everyone has doubts in themselves, but once you accomplish something really cool, it is a really good feeling.This confidence will definitely help me when I face my next hard task.

The skills I learned by also learning how to sew will also help me in my professional career. The whole project of upcycling and transforming things has made me more creative and a stronger problem solver. These are great qualities that I can talk about on resumes and this story could even be used in a personal statement and interviews. By keeping up with my skills of sewing, this also improves my hand coordination. I have a dream job of being an oral surgeon, so my skills of learning how to hand stitch can also help me to suture very well/give me a head start on my practice of suturing.

I am an Environmental Public Health major, so this project very much coordinates with my major and my passion for bettering the health of people and the environment. It was very fun to research some environmental problems and actively advocate for people to make more sustainable choices by supporting slow fashion.

OSU game day outfit

Outfit upcycled from grey nike sweatpants and an old t-shirt

link to YouTube video: https://youtu.be/c6L-upkm5pU

For my STEP Signature Project, I enrolled in a six-week online summer acting intensive at The Neighborhood Playhouse in New York City. Classes ran every weekday from 9am to 4pm, and I had numerous classes including modern dance, jazz, ballet, acting on camera, voice & speech, and Meisner technique. The Meisner technique class is the only class I had everyday, and it is the main focus of the program. Prior to this program, I have had minimal acting and voice training as well as zero dance training; however, acting has always been a massive passion of mine as I have done drama club as well as play roles in small short films. All in all, this program proved to be a challenge that I believe I gleaned a lot from.

    Prior to beginning my STEP Signature Project, I had no idea how much this project would truly impact me. One of my classes, the Meisner technique class, occurred everyday for 3 hours. In this class, Professor Jim would run drills with students, such as the famed repetition exercise, that would push our focus off of ourselves and onto our acting partner. The exercise works exactly how it sounds: you have two people who face each other and repeat the same phrase back and forth and let the truest possible emotional reactions occur. This exercise encourages students to find out what holds them back from their truest performance; however, I found that it also showed me what was holding me back from my truest self. I realized that not only do I shy away from my own emotions in my performances, but I was shying away from my own emotions in my actual life.

Through these exercises, I was able to learn so much about myself and how I communicate with people. The repetition exercise especially showed me how much attention I normally pay myself that inhibits my performance as well as real life interactions. I began to notice as the program went on that not only were my acting skills developing far beyond my expectations, but I was becoming more confident in social situations too. Throughout the past six weeks, I completely dropped the focus off of myself and learned to truly live in the moment in and out of the scene.

    One of the main proponents of my development was my professor, Jim Brill. 

Professor Brill relentlessly pushed me to be more open and encouraged me to embrace my true emotions in a scene. His constant advice served as a huge motivator for the work I dedicated to the program. I remember specifically after one scene where I could not fully act out, he encouraged me to think about what was holding me back from truly screaming and feeling my own anger. Upon self-reflecting, I was able to learn more about myself than I previously thought possible by figuring out why I was holding myself back from feeling my own emotions. Thus, Professor Brill made a tremendous impact on my performance and life. With his instruction, I was able to achieve a level of performance I had previously only seen in those I looked up to.

    His instruction led me right into my breakthrough. During the fourth week of classes, we began partnered scene work. In said scene work, I was partnered with one of my classmates of the same age as me, Mia. Mia and I worked restlessly in and out of class to perfect our performances together. I’ll always remember the way I felt in our final performance of the scene, or rather what I’d like to call my breakthrough. We pushed each other hard with our intensity and exhausted ourselves trying to be present in the scene. The result led me to the exploration of a part of myself I had rarely accessed. Both the scene and my scene partner pushed me to access anger within myself and express it freely without consequence. I was able to embody the character as my truest self.

    It was through this embodiment that I was able to explore my performance and myself. I am forever thankful to Professor Brill and Mia for pushing me forth in delving into my own emotions. For once, I was able to let go of my anxieties and embrace myself as a performer and a person. I remember feeling entirely present and reacting to Mia with incredible honesty, it felt as if I wasn’t acting at all: my performance was entirely genuine. Before this six week intensive began, I truly was a different person. I held back so much of myself without even realizing it in order to “filter” myself. This class showed me how to not hide myself from others and how to allow myself to be authentic. This class in its entirety gave me the tools to fully fulfil my intended goal with the class: developing my skills as an actor and a person.

    I believe that the vulnerability I achieved in this course is a vulnerability I will carry with me always. Prior to this class I hadn’t even realized how much of myself I was holding back. There has always been a piece of myself I have been too anxious to reveal, and being forced to react in the moment to a partner taught me to not focus on myself as much and rather live in the present moment. This lesson is so deeply important to me because while I wanted this program to better me as a person, I had no idea how deep that transformation would go. I really feel as though this program pulled me out of my shell.

    Beyond my personal development, this program succeeded in refining my talents as an actor. Professor Brill spoke to me on the last day of class and said, “If I watched a video of you on the first day and a video now, I would think they were two different students”. Professor Brill’s words confirmed my suspicions that my improvement was tremendous. I fully believe this program took me higher than I imagined with the development of my acting skills. This means so much to me because it has been my dream to perform for years, whether it be as a hobby or career. This program provided me with the training and confidence to do well as an actor. I feel beyond prepared to take on roles in Ohio State theatre productions as well as outside productions after college. Acting is my one true dream, and this program gave me the confirmation I have the ability to achieve it.

Pictured above are two of the pages to the final scene I performed with my partner, Mia.

Pictured here is advice for self tapes that was given to me by Nick Ferrantino, an assistant to one of my Professors for my Acting On Camera class.

Here you can see a screenshot of my class that I had everyday: Meisner technique. You can see me, Marissa Martin, in the photo as well as my partner, Mia, and my professor, Jim.

Pictured here is an ego-gram, Professor Todd Susman believes making one about the character you are auditioning for is a great way to get to know the character inside and out.

My STEP project focused on improving my confidence in skills I love but bring me stress when performing for others. I took weekly singing lessons for the summer as well as weekly online dance classes at Broadway Dance Center. Both of these programs followed my goal of becoming a better musical theatre performer and preparing to choreograph a show.

Taking singing and dancing lessons doesn’t sound like a dramatic transformational experience, but I learned a lot about myself over the summer. I love these subjects dearly, but I always found myself crumpling when it came to performing. My main goal was to end this dreadful cycle I found myself in by putting in the hard work to improve. Over the eight weeks I realized just how hard I was holding myself to a perfectionist standard and completely ruining the things I enjoyed. While lessons could help me feel more confident in my abilities, I was treating them like a to-do list and not like the ongoing process they are. At some point between high school and college, my escape became another stressor, and not just because I wanted to sound and look like all the Broadway stars. I decided that what others think of my talent directly correlated to my worth, and that makes me imitate others to an unachievable goal. Moving forward, I have to realize that any art, or anything for that matter, that I put into the world has value whether it’s groundbreaking or not.

When I went in for my first singing lesson, I was regretting my decision for the project. My proposal was based around letting myself be seen by others to force myself out of my comfort zone, so of course I was filled with anxiety and dread. In the middle of a song I had a complete meltdown and wanted to ditch the entire project. I didn’t sound how I wanted to sound, I kept focusing on my teacher’s reactions, and the embarrassment was taking control. All I could think about was what he was thinking about me. He was very kind and tried to help all he could, but I could tell he felt wary about preparing for the next seven lessons. I left dejected but determined to come the next week and blow him away. To do this hours of practice was necessary, along with finding coping methods to push the anxiety away.

The next week I could see the surprise on his face that I was asking for critiques. Critiques are necessary to get better, but recently they had just sounded like reasons I wasn’t good enough. I was extremely lucky to get the singing teacher I did. He understood my problems and how they translated into my singing. He knew ways to help me push past them that others hadn’t. For example, if I was afraid I wasn’t going to be able to hit a note I’d end up faking it, so he’d have me sing it into a kazoo first to trick my brain. His advice on finding my own tone and how to act naturally led to me feeling for the first time like I could actually do this on stage. This relationship also taught me, head-on, that skills like this take time. The process isn’t linear. Lesson 4 I was belting one of my favorite musicals well, but in lesson 5 I felt like I was right back where I started. Vocal cords are a muscle, and they need trained and have bad days just like anything else.

My Broadway Dance Center classes were always the highlight of my day. One class I took was with Lane Napper (the hip hop teacher from Victorious) and was challenging in the best way. Online dance is absolutely harder for those who have danced before. It requires a lot of focus and comfort to have people judging you through a screen. Sometimes I felt the urge to turn my camera off, but when I did I found I didn’t try nearly as hard. It made me realize just how much of my ability formed because I was held accountable by those around me. That can be a great thing, but it instilled this negative reaction to not being the best. In class we would often do groups to watch others. In such an advance setting it reminded me just how much room there is to improve. Maybe I can dance, but these people were performing. The people who were called out weren’t the ones perfecting the choreography, but the ones putting their own spin on it. Over the past few years I hadn’t been using dance to express myself, but instead to earn my place in the class. Combining the two is necessary to do musical theatre, and to create it.

Here at OSU I find myself in a dance minor and choreographing a musical. In those spaces I am able to create wonderful things and enjoy learning in a different way, but instead I focus on imaginary judgment. In a couple years I will start law school. High hopes of reforming policy and advocating for juveniles gives me purpose, but the path to get there can be terrifying. Law school classes are graded on speaking at the drop of a hat, proving you know your stuff in front of everyone without time to prepare. Before this project my mindset for improving myself was all wrong. My methods were to imitate the people who impressed me, to agree with what others were saying. If I keep my head down and only express myself in safe settings like on paper, eventually results will come. Those routines will only have you reach average levels of careers, not to be a singer, choreographer, or a lawyer that others will look up to. I am capable and need to trust myself over others. You have to be proud of what you do and let others see, otherwise no one has any reason to put their trust you. I’ve always struggled with being a leader, and this project showed me exactly why. Knowing what I now know about myself, I can take on leadership positions and put my own work into the world.

Here is a couple pictures of me during my advanced dance classes. Dancing in the living room was something I had to get used to.