relationships

The Power of Kindness

Man in business suit crouching and shaking the hand of a seated homeless man

World Kindness Week and Day (November 13th) are upon us. While we prepare for the holiday season, it is important to know how a little kindness can go a long way. The American Psychological Association defines kindness as a “benevolent and helpful action intentionally directed toward another person” and “is often considered to be motivated by the desire to help another, not to gain explicit reward or to avoid explicit punishment.” Kindness brings a sense of happiness and well-being to those it is directed toward—and to the one giving it. In research, kindness has been shown to build social bonds, increase trust and acceptance in our relationships, and increase overall happiness in ourselves.

Instinctively, we as humans seek to create positive environments for the survival, well-being, and happiness of ourselves and those around us. Take, for example, affective touch, like a hug, from someone we feel close to. Affective touch can make us feel relaxed, safe, and calm, and activates our parasympathetic response when our brain interprets it from a non-threatening source. Kindness can also positively impact us on the social, national, and international scales. Research shows that kinder societies also tend to be happier societies. “Engaging in benevolent acts and expecting kindness from others” both correlated with individual happiness levels. So, how can we utilize the power of kindness this season and beyond? Below are a few things to consider about kindness in practice:

  • “Kindness starts with being kind to yourself”: Take the time to look after your needs. Eat a well-balanced diet, exercise, give yourself time to breathe and rest, and be mindful of your thoughts and emotions. It is harder to practice kindness if you aren’t first kind to yourself.
  • “Lead with compassion, follow with kindness”: It may be checking in on a coworker who is struggling or offering to get coffee when someone seems overwhelmed. Always remember that we may not have the full picture of what someone is going through, but we can still lead with compassion and follow with kindness.
  • “Give to give, not to receive”: Knowing the benefits of being kind to others can make us desire those rewards. However, oftentimes giving kindness just to give it is much more rewarding.
  • “Practice makes kinder”: The more we practice kindness, the kinder we become. If random acts of kindness don’t come easily, challenge yourself to do one kind thing each day for someone and watch how much easier it gets.
  • “Kindness begets kindness”: Just as a bully can create a culture of fear, so can kindness from one help foster kindness in others. So, try to lead by example and start helping people turn to one another in small and big ways.

Remember that the power of kindness can have lasting effects. We can reflect and remember a time when someone did a kind act or had a kind word for us. Seek to make a lasting positive impact on someone, not just this holiday season, but every day of the year.

Written by: Aaron Fowler, Extension Educator, Family and Consumer Sciences, Ohio State University Extension, Greene County, fowler.440@osu.edu.

Reviewed by: Lisa Barlage, Extension Educator, Family and Consumer Sciences, Ohio State University Extension, Ross County, barlage.7@osu.edu.

How Important are Your Friends to Your Health?

Friendship is one of the most elevating aspects of life. Besides fun and connection, friendship can provide important emotional and physical support. Friendship also plays a central role in our overall well-being. Recent studies suggest, “People who value social relationships are likelier to be happy than those who value achievements in other life domains, such as education and career.” This highlights for us that while accomplishments in career and education are important, the happiness we enjoy from our social connections surpasses all our other achievements.

One of the great benefits of friendship is the emotional support it provides. Good friendships celebrate our successes and provide support during tough times. This support can provide us with belonging and validation, which is essential for our mental health. Research indicates that “the strength of family and relationships with friends is related to happiness and life satisfaction, directly as well as indirectly through an impact on health.” The positive connections of friends contribute to a more rewarding life.  We know that we are social by nature. Relationships are important to our survival and happiness.  A variety of stable and supportive relationships, at work, at home, and in our community, give us the support we need to cope with the challenges and stress we encounter in life.

two friends high-fiving

Recently, while traveling for work, several friends provided support to me by attending my kids’ sporting events since I was unable to attend. Another friend picked up copies of the local paper that contained a picture of my daughter so that I wouldn’t miss it. These small acts may not have taken a lot of time but made me and my family feel like a part of the community. I appreciated this reminder that acts of kindness and friendship are not always large, expensive, or time-consuming but instead focused on connecting with or supporting each other.

Friendships are also good for our overall health. “Feeling connected socially has a positive influence not only on psychological well-being but also on physical well-being.” Having strong social ties has been linked to lower rates of anxiety, depression, and various health issues. Research shows that people with strong social bonds tend to live longer, healthier lives.

It’s important we recognize the value of friendships in our lives. The happiness derived from strong social connections can lead to a more satisfying life. By prioritizing relationships, we not only enrich our own lives but also create a support system for those we care about.  We can let our friends know we appreciate their contribution to our lives in small ways. Regularly telling our friends how much they mean to us, being excited about their accomplishments, praising their hard work, greeting them warmly, and more are all ways we can regularly let our friends know we are there for them and are appreciative of them in our lives.

a group of friends

Written By:

Alisha Barton, Family and Consumer Sciences Educator, Ohio State University Extension, Miami County, barton.345@osu.edu

Reviewed By:

  Jessica Lowe, Family and Consumer Sciences Educator, Ohio State University Extension, Pickaway County, lowe.495@osu.edu

 

Resources:

Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. (n.d.). Social connection. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. https://www.cdc.gov/social-connectedness/about/index.html

George, K., & Douglis, S. (2024, September 20). How to show your friends you care about them. NPR. https://www.npr.org/2022/09/01/1120550646/how-to-show-your-friends-you-love-them-according-to-a-friendship-expert

Song, I., Kwon, J.-W., & Jeon, S. M. (2023, July 13). The relative importance of friendship to happiness increases with age. PloS one. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC10343095/

Umberson, D., & Montez, J. K. (2010). Social relationships and health: a flashpoint for health policy. Journal of health and social behavior, 51 Suppl(Suppl), S54–S66. https://doi.org/10.1177/0022146510383501

 

We Are a Family

Adults and kids sitting in the grass

While working on my new house, I took a moment to be mindful and present, I looked around at everyone working outside, all family and friends, thinking how grateful I am for such an amazing family who is willing to help me succeed as I take the next step into adulthood. Family can look different for everyone whether it is blood relatives or a “chosen family”. Some common types of family units are nuclear families (2 biological parents), single parent families, stepfamilies, childless families, extended families (other relatives raising children), adopted families, and grandparent families. Every family structure has its unique advantages and challenges. If you are part of a family that is raising children, the bottom line is providing a nurturing environment where kids can feel safe, loved, and encouraged to be themselves. Think about your family, in what ways did those around you support you? Family is very important to our health from infants to adults and can impact development socially and emotionally.

            Environment can influence families as well, whether it is stressing surrounding money, custody issues, health problems, or behavior problems. Disagreements are normal for families and stress can provide a great opportunity to implement changes in communication and priorities as a family to bring balance back to the household SCAN notes. Families are a foundation and provide us with so many important life skills, social skills, and opportunities to grow. Joy Rouse at Iowa State Extension mentions that strong families share characteristics such as making appreciation known, spending time together, and talking about issues small and large. Depending on the ways you and your family express appreciation and communicate to one another may be different than your own, so keep that in mind when trying to express gratitude. Today, I challenge you to think about what family means to you, and three people you consider your family. What are ways you can encourage and support them?

Sources

Rouse, J. (2021, April 10). Build a Strong Family to Benefit Children and Adults. Iowa State University Extension. https://www.extension.iastate.edu/news/build-strong-family-benefit-children-and-adults

SCAN. (2013, September 5). Family Stress. https://scanva.org/parent-resource-post/family-stress/

Writer: Alexus Masterson, Extension Educator, Family & Consumer Sciences, Ohio State University Extension, Muskingum County, masterson.98@osu.edu

Reviewer: Beth Stefura, Extension Educator, Family & Consumer Sciences, Ohio State University, Mahoning County, stefura.2@osu.edu

Best Practices for the Best Parties

People celebrating at the table

This is a busy year of event planning for me! With my wedding this spring, my niece’s first birthday party this summer, and preparing to host holiday meals at my house for the first time this winter, I have been learning a lot about the “dos and don’ts” of successful party planning. Are you preparing to host an event of your own? Here are a few of the best practices I have learned throughout the past year:

Food

Food can be a big part of social get togethers! Whether you are planning to serve a full meal or offer light snacks and refreshments, it is important to always be food safe and follow the Core Four Practices:

  • Clean – Wash your hands, utensils, and kitchen surfaces before and after handling food.
  • Separate – Be careful not to cross-contaminate, especially if you are handing raw meat, seafood, or eggs at your event. Keep ready-to-eat food away from these raw meats.
  • Cook – All hot foods should be cooked to a safe internal temperature. Use a food thermometer to ensure your food is fully cooked.
  • Chill – Keep cold foods cold! Refrigerated foods should be kept at 40 degrees Fahrenheit or below. Frozen foods should be kept at zero degrees Fahrenheit or below.

Location

Events can be held indoors or outdoors (and sometimes even both at once!). It’s important to make sure your venue is free of fall hazards for both older and younger guests.

  • For indoor locations, be sure to keep walkways clear and well-lit. Carpet should be fixed firmly to the floor and throw rugs should be removed, as they are common slipping hazards. If any spills are made in the house, be sure to clean up quickly to avoid this fall risk. Lastly, if you have pets in your home, consider keeping them in a separate room during your event, so that they don’t trip your guests.
  • For outdoor locations, be sure steps are in good condition and that a handrail is nearby to help guests maintain balance. Turn on porch lights or offer flashlights if your event will be during the evening. For winter events, be cautious of ice on walkways and use salt or sand to make them less slippery.

Relationships

Parties and other events are a great way to connect with old friends and to meet new acquaintances as well. When hosting a party, take time to ask people questions about themselves as well as share a little about your life in return. When I talk with someone I don’t know, I’m always amazed at the new things I learn from them. This sharing can help build trust and helps the person know that you care and are actively listening.

I hope these tips help you in planning the best event ever for your loved ones! Be sure to let us know in a comment below if you have any additional advice to share!

Written by:  Jessica Lowe, Family and Consumer Sciences Educator, Pickaway County, Ohio State University Extension, lowe.495@osu.edu

Reviewed by:  Dan Remley, Field Specialist, Food, Nutrition and Wellness, OSU Extension

Resources:

Axner, M. (n.d.). Section 7. building and sustaining relationships. Community Tool Box. https://ctb.ku.edu/en/table-of-contents/leadership/leadership-functions/build-sustain-relationships/main

The core four practices of Food Safety: Fightbac. Partnership for Food Safety Education. (2022, February 15). https://www.fightbac.org/food-safety-basics/the-core-four-practices/

U.S. Department of Health and Human Services. (n.d.). Preventing falls at home: Room by room. National Institute on Aging. https://www.nia.nih.gov/health/preventing-falls-home-room-room