When I took the test, I was an 8, but I’ve also already taken the test and was a 2. I’d like to think that my score of 8 is because we’ve all been stuck in the house for a few weeks. When I looked at my characteristic for 2, it says that my Direction of Disintegration (which happens when I’m stressed) makes me into an aggressive and dominating 8, while if I were an 8 I would become a 2 with growth. This makes sense now. Some of the most distinctive features of a 2, The Helper, is that we are empathetic, sincere, and warm-hearted. We have a hard time saying no when it comes to helping others, and can sometimes undermine ourselves with good intentions. Some of the difficulties that come with being a type 2 are that we can be possessive and not recognize our own needs. We fear being unwanted, and always want to be loved. Our key motivations are to express our feelings, be needed, be loved, be appreciated, have others respond to them, and have others affirm their claims about themselves. When a type 2 goes through growth, they become more like a 4, which is the individualist, because they start becoming more emotionally aware. Examples of type 2s that I find cool are Eleanor Roosevelt, Nancy Reagan, John Denver, Lionel Richie, Stevie Wonder, Dolly Parton, and Priscilla Presley.
I think that type 2 fits me really well. When I’m in my normal state (not in quarantine) I am usually really open about my feelings and love to help others. However, when I’m stressed, I become more like an 8 in that I focus more on getting things done and seek to control the situation I’m in. In a way I become a more aggressive but also strong version of myself. There have been times where I’ve been in a leadership position and I get stressed and finally put my foot down and don’t think of anything else but resolving the issue at hand in a logical and objective way. Usually I’m pretty calm, but in my head I’m scrambling for a way to just get the problem out of the way. This could be an negative in that it doesn’t allow me to be myself, but it could be positive because I get things done. Usually I feel guilty after acting aggressive, because I know that that isn’t what my friends or teammates are expecting, but it’s just how I have to get things done sometimes. I’ve also definitely gone into phases where I get very introspective and more like a type 4. I sometimes question what I actually want out of my life in terms of career and relationships. Sometimes I wonder if I actually do want to be doing the things I am, such as having a certain major or even what relationships I have with people I care about. I think this is also important for a leader, because usually I end up remembering or finding new reasons why I’m on the path I’m on, and that’s always a good thing to do within a team. It’s important to step back and say “What do I want out of this, and what am I putting into it? Is there a better way to do the things we strive to achieve? Is there a need we haven’t seen because we’ve been too focused on one part of a plan?”.
A way that I can grow is by prioritizing myself a little more than some of my other responsibilities, especially to people who don’t do the same for me. I think relationships are important, but putting in a ton of work while the other person doesn’t want to contribute is just a waste of effort. It’s important for me to find these one-sided relationships where maybe I feel like I’m balancing on eggshells to get someone to like who I am, and change them. I know of a few one-sided relationships where the most likely solution is for me to stand up for myself and say, “I’m tired of wondering what you want from me, and I need you to put in effort.” and they would. But there are also relationships I have where if I told them to put in more effort they would end up discontinuing the relationship. Maybe that’s what needs to happen.
I think a way that I can maximize my growth at Ohio State is by seeking out those relationships which have the same amount of effort being put in by each of us. I’m lucky to have found a friend group in which we all try to communicate with each other and share as many experiences as possible, while also respecting the efforts of others who aren’t available either physically to spend time together, or emotionally to really take down their walls and express themselves fully. I hope to find even more friends like this, because they’re honest with me while also being kind and helping me grow as a person. I’m hoping to engage in more clubs this next semester, and I will be in some classes toward my major, so I will probably be meeting a lot of new people and finding those that I want to forge great relationships with.
Overall, I think being a type 2 makes me a promising leader, because I want to accommodate others, but I also want to get things done and know that we’re engaged for the right reasons. I also look forward to finding new people who can help me foster my own growth as a person throughout my time at Ohio State.