Nothing is more stressful to me than talking about my future. I mean, I barely know what I want to do for the day, let alone ten years from now. When I think of my future self, I see her as old and slow. Maybe she will be wiser, but I would rather live in the now than worry about the aging cellular processes my body goes through everyday. One might think it is a fear of mortality, but I disagree. Rather, it is a fear of not being able to accomplish what I want in the short time I have on this earth.
When I was young, I wanted to be a scientist. The word itself glittered and I pictured my young frame in a long lab coat, working diligently over test tubes of fun colored liquids. It is crazy to see how little has changed. For me, it was never about the title but rather what I could do and discover with the education and tools present. That is still very important now.
As I continue my education as a major in chemistry and with minors in sustainable agriculture and physics, I realize how set and determined I am to graduate and follow my goals. In fact, I would go as far to say that I am implementing my goals in my career planning model. My major and minors revolve around what I want to research once I am out of college. I have the goal to understand herbicide’s and pesticide’s chemical structures and figure out how to make them more environmentally friendly. I also know that I wish to go back to school to study biochemsitry so I can further research into GMO’s and and create sustainable seeds for third world countries. First, I must finish my education. But I am hoping to intern at a scientific company and learn hands on what school cannot teach me. I just have to remind myself to take it all one day at a time.
The website provided did recommend that for my personality, IRA, biochemistry was a good field to work in. It was a cool discovery, however I try hard not to put too much merit into these kinds of tests. After all, who will know what I love better than me.
That is not to say I came out of the experience learning nothing. I learned how fluid passion can be and I listened to the struggles of my friends who did not know exactly what they wanted to do. I am surprisingly fortunate to be given the opportunities and education that allowed me to decide how I wanted my life to go. However, I am amazed by my friends and everything that they want to discover and research. I believe that there is no reason for them to limit themselves and I know they will find something that makes them happy.
As for me, I discovered the stress that is accompanied by looking at the future. But I do not think it is a bad thing. Instead I see it as an obstacle that can be overcome through hard work and determination. I will achieve my goals, I will continue to work hard, and I will be happy. If a new passion comes my way, I will be happy to chase it. This is the only life I have after all.