“To say that Indians are obsessed with the idea of marriage is an understatement” is the opening sentence by Dr. Aparajita Jeedigunta on her article about Indian and Indian-American culture and its relationship with matrimony (Jeedigunta). The Indian wedding is one of the most important and extravagant events within a given family. Influenced by Bollywood and India’s richest residents, Indians and Indian-Americans strive to have some of the flashiest weddings around (Lal). Culturally, making sure your children are married soon and to the right people is paramount to parents’ claim to fame (Administrator). Not only must children be completely focused on education and their career but must also be wed before hitting the early 30s. If a child is not married by then, peers begin to view the parents as being neglectful (Administrator).
The current social structure of marriage in Indian culture stems from old customs and traditions. However, there is tension within Indian immigrant households in the United States. Children growing up in the States start to embrace popular American culture and attitude towards marriage and social life. Being completely different from one another, Indian and American culture clash. Immigrant Indian parents were raised to believe that the children must be married young, to people within their religion or race as well as social class (Administrator). Indian-Americans tend to view this as old fashioned. They feel that the priorities of the parents are counterproductive to their social development (Jeedigunta). In some homes, dowries and arranged marriages prosper and neglect to recognize the opinions of the child.
Additionally, the expenses of these weddings are cause for concern. Due to the extravagance of the event, many families must resort to loans and pile on debt to achieve the right look. The Indian wedding is a time to flaunt wealth and class to guestlists of hundreds. As part of social status, some weddings are cancelled (Lal). If all needs are not met, some families call off weddings and relationships altogether. Due to the idea that women leave the family after marriage, they are viewed as a liability for a family’s expenses. Therefore, the family of the groom has more say in what the wedding should be like. The men are thought to be an investment in the future of the family (Lal). These power dynamics, mixed with all other expectations, have proven to be a large issue with Indian-Americans who are caught between two cultures.
Works Cited
Administrator, grandforksherald. “Dating and Marriage: Tradition Meets Tension in Indian-American Homes.” Grand Forks Herald, Grand Forks Herald, 23 Jan. 2010, www.grandforksherald.com/news/2118215-dating-and-marriage-tradition-meets-tension-indian-american-homes.
Jeedigunta, Aparajita. “The Indian-American Marriage Conundrum.” The Indian SCENE, 1 July 2019, theindianscene.com/health/the-indian-american-marriage-conundrum/.
Lal, Neeta. “The Financial Burden of Weddings on India’s Poorest Families.” Arts and Culture News | Al Jazeera, Al Jazeera, 31 Jan. 2021, www.aljazeera.com/features/2021/1/31/the-financial-burden-of-weddings-on-indias-poorest-families.