Jhumpa Lahiri, the author of Interpreter of the Maladies, tends to have some of her characters who are immigrants of India experience cultural displacement, marital troubles, or problems of finding their own identity. Immigrants can suffer a lot of emotional trauma from their experience of moving from their home country. Displacement from others can be difficult to deal with but having those who support and love you can make the situation better.
Love is a strong bond, and it’s feeling brings people and families together. Sometimes relationships can result in a friendship or even marriage. Love can also come with conflict and barriers. Some barriers include language, culture, and socioeconomic class, which can put a damper on any relationship if not accepted. While many parents try and look out for their child’s best interest, controlling everything, including who they marry is not a great option. In some cultures, arranged marriages are common and accepted. For example, in India, it is still considered the norm, with 90 percent of marriages being arranged, but in the United States, it is less common.
I would consider Twinkle and Sanjeev’s relationship is similar to an arranged marriage but a modern version of it. In This Blessed House, both Twinkle and Sanjeev had an option to show interest in one another and the choice of marriage. They married within a few months and following their marriage they experienced some tension between the two of them. Many couples experience these struggles regardless of an arranged marriage or not. They found that compromises need to be made to make the other happy. Like all relationships, there has to be given and take. Both individuals have to be on board and be willing to express themselves to make the relationship work. Deep rooting a relationship between love and bond that is created can help the couple grow and get closer together. In doing so, it allows both individuals to find their own identity, along with an identity together.
Emery, Léa Rose. “What Modern Arranged Marriages Really Look Like.” Brides, 11 Sept. 2020, www.brides.com/story/modern-arranged-marriages.
Jhumpa Lahiri Biography. (2006, October 31). Retrieved March 20, 2021, from https://www.chipublib.org/jhumpa-lahiri-biography/
Lahiri, J. (2019). Interpreter of maladies: Stories. Boston: Mariner Books, Houghton Mifflin Harcourt.
Thank you for giving a contextual background on arranged marriages in the Indian culture. From your post I was able to draw upon other cultures that I know of having arranged marriages and consider how their love and relationships may be affected by this. For example, in my Hebrew Film class last semester, in a movie we watched, there was an arranged marriage that crossed between the Jewish and Iranian cultures and religions which led to conflict on where the couple was to live since they are divided by a gate at the border.
Your contextual presentation allowed me to wonder the outcome of their marriage since it was not seen in the video and then think about how Twinkle and Sanjeev’s marriage turned out as well. I wonder if there was any love or interest in the Jewish and Iranian marriage, somewhat like what Twinkle and Sanjeev had, or if their barrier in culture was too much to handle.
I really liked how your context presentation focused on arranged marriages. Since I did not grow up in the Indian culture, I find the idea of arranged marriages very unusual and atypical. However, as you said, it is the norm in some countries, such as India. The idea is that parents know their child best and can look out for their child’s best interests by deciding who is “good enough” to marry their child. Because the people that are married off don’t usually know each other well, they encounter conflicts in their marriage. Similar to Twinkie and Sanjeev, many couples struggle with communicating and compromising. This is even more prevalent in arranged marriages, since they don’t know how the other person typically communicates and how they solve problems. Once a couple learns how to communicate properly, arranged marriage or not, it allows them to grow both as individuals and as a pair.
Hello Caelan!
I enjoyed reading your context presentation and learning more about arranged marriages. This was an interesting topic to talk about. I did not know that nearly 90% of marriages in India are arranged by the parents. I never knew about that and I do not think many others knew. However, it is really neat to learn about different cultures and what is normal for their culture compared to our own. Relationships are all about communication. Needing good communication helps your significant other know what is going on. I find that bad communication leads to other problems. I agree that a relationship is about compromise. While in a relationship it is not about you anymore, it is about the two of you and what is best for you two. I really enjoyed reading your thoughts about arranged marriages and relationships.
Great presentation! I think what I found interesting is that since we have been thinking about the struggles and difficulties of being a different race, nationality, culture, etc. I almost forgot that these people also face the same things we do in addition to that. The marriage struggle between Shoba and Shukumar that we see is a very common issue that arises all the time. It was refreshing to kind of step out and remember they are people who have the same problems we all do. Made the characters easier to relate to.
Nice presentation. Arranged marriage is a topic and culture that I had little knowledge about since it isn’t practiced often in my community. Having this information about the practice helps with understanding the story Lahiri writes about. I’ve always thought that arranged marriages must be difficult since it involves marrying people who have little knowledge about one another and are forced into a relationship. Examples of this that I know of is from stories and movies about heirs of royalty having to marry one another whether for it to preserve good relations between countries or to share wealth between nations. Learning that arranged marriage is a common practice between everyday people in different parts of the world was interesting to learn about.
Hi, I agree with you that many minorities may go through struggling with their identies at some point in their lives. It gets hard when you are constantly remind that you are different from everyone around you and made fun of that. I think that your point on marriage was a spot on point and written well. I think several people have a few problems a few months after they get married. Personally I would not want to be in an arrange marriage because I want to chose who I fall in love with and spend the rest of my life with. I would like to have that choice. It may work for some couple and it may not work. Great work