Delayed Communication

Hey everyone! So it has been a while since my last post. I feel like this is a great day to speak about communication with college students.

College is nowhere near high school. Friends change, class sizes change, the environment changes, even our most basic habits and hobbies even change!

Yesterday I was informed by a former interested party that I, “fail to communicate”. For the sake of this post, I would like to say that there are two different cultures of people in the world: college students (past and present) and those who are not college students (past and present). For those of us college students (past and present) it is easy for us to see that we have extremely limited time to spend with others (family, friends, significant others/dates). We are consumed with loads of homework (absurdly larger) than the amount we were accustomed to in high school. We have meetings with professors, various offices (as part of course requirements), meetings with our advisors (that aren’t always the most convenient to our schedules), tutoring sessions (for those subjects we struggle in *cough, cough MATH!*, group projects (that professors don’t allow in class time to be set aside for), student leadership experiences (meetings, organizations, campus ambassador, provide tours, freshmen orientations…) and even volunteering (both assigned for courses, and to help us gain critical experience that we need to make ourselves even more marketable in the real world.

I think it is safe to say that is a pretty exhausting list! Speaking for myself, I am usually pretty drained by the time I get home…oh wait…can’t forget those friends/faculty/staff who ask you to do something last minute…and you don’t know how to say no…so the day hasn’t stopped yet. Ok, now I am at home…drained and so tired that I can’t even work up energy to make dinner, or walk the short flight of stairs to my bedroom, so I pass out on the couch.

While this might sound like a rant, it’s more of trying to provide a different lens for family, friends, and loved ones…of mine, and others…to take into consideration if you don’t get an immediate response, if you don’t hear from them in a few days…or hell, even a week sometimes, if they forget to show up to an event/date…

Non-college students (past and present) are held to similar time-constraints, I don’t deny that! What I am hoping you gain from this is that you take some extra time to allow the person to respond, to maybe remind them 3-4 times more than usual. Our lives are stressful, and we want to spend time with others outside of our academic setting. Sometimes exhaustion ruins this for us. Sometimes we simply forget with all that we are dealing with.

…and remember, Go Bucks!

P.S. After writing a post about being exhausted, I’m exhausted!

Privileged Elite

I just left my School & Society class, and at the end of class, our professor made us close our eyes and imagine someone we went to school with. We had to remember some student who was different than us. She didn’t tell us in what way. I imagined my friend from 8th grade in junior high school. He was the only black boy in our school…and of course, we became friends. I learned early in life how much I enjoy being friends with someone who is different, learning about the way their life is different than my own. Escapism has always been my thing. I escape reality by creating these mental versions of an alternate life for myself.

But I’m getting off topic…

So she continued, that we needed to think, “Where are they now? Did they graduate high school? Are they the sole provider in their home? Do they have a job? A family? Homeless? Did they go to college? Did they get a degree?” My brain stopped thinking at that point. Because after 8th grade I was removed from my foster home, and lost the contact with that friend that I had forgotten from so many years ago. Then she said, “You’re part of the privileged elite, because you are HERE at THE Ohio State University”. I wasn’t expecting to become so emotionally tapped. I started feeling uncomfortable. I am nearly 34 years old, and by May 2017 I will graduate college with a B.A. degree. I felt uncomfortable because being a non-traditional student I thought well I hope this friend from my past has in fact graduated college at the traditional age, has a degree, a family, provides for them…this was my vision for my friend, because I believe in the law of attraction. If I believe it, he will have achieved it!

As I arrived to the office after class, I started rethinking. I don’t feel bad that I am in college, while so many aren’t. Not because I don’t want them to be in college. I do! Not because they don’t deserve it, because they do! I don’t feel bad, because this is my story. My journey to college wasn’t easy. I had my own personal struggles, I’ve had life changes some that I could have prevented and some that I couldn’t, I have worked full time between multiple jobs while attending full time, dealing with severe seasonal depression, the loss of my newborn niece, letting go of unhealthy friendships, I was homeless and have had my own place that I pay for (even though sometimes I barely have 2 pennies after rent and bills are paid) but it is mine!, I’ve ran out of tuition but I managed to figure out assistance to help me continue to reach my goal of getting my diploma next year. So, while my journey hasn’t been easy, it’s been pretty fucking tough actually, but I am proud because of all these obstacles, I have triumphed and I continue to triumph as I get closer and closer til that ridiculous piece of paper informs people worldwide that I do in fact have the skills and qualities in the career world.

I am one of the privileged elite, and I am a Buckeye for life.

…and remember, Go Bucks!

 

Equal To or Greater Than Calculus

Today’s the day! The first day of Spring semester!

Let me tell you how this day went down…

*5:30 a.m. wiiiiiiiiiiiide awake! I tried to go back to sleep. I tossed. I turned. I screamed. I killed my pillow a few times! Nothing worked.
*6 a.m. After much torture, I crawled out of bed, and raced to the coffee pot.
*6:30 a.m. Called the taxi.
*6:30 a.m. While waiting for the taxi, I frantically was throwing all the electronics in my bookbag. I forgot the calculator. I turn the power button. *Blank screen* *Hits power button on repeat for 5 minutes* *Realizes batteries are dead.* *Math phobia induces anxiety attack* *Screams a few cuss words, somehow not waking my roommate*
*7:00 a.m. Actually managed to drink a whole cup of coffee, and eat a bowl of Fruity Pebbles. Don’t judge me. You know you eat that shit too!
*7:30 a.m. Calls taxi impatiently, inquiring “Where are you? I have class soon!” Taxi: “She’s on her way. *Hangs up*”
*7:45 a.m. Calls taxi again. Taxi: “She’s out front. *Hangs up*
*7:45 a.m. Calls taxi again. “No, she isn’t.” Taxi: *muffled noise* “She is trying to find you.” So I walk outside ready for her to pull in. Taxi: *flies right on by me, doesn’t stop, but blares horn* So I think, is this a game? Am I supposed to chase after it, run and jump into the cab? *SMH* So I walk halfway through the complex, while she ever so slowly backs up… Taxi: I should have known where you lived! Me: You had one job…*stares angrily out the window*
*7:55 a.m. Arrive at campus, drop off my lunch in the CAB office, rush to my Math 1050 class.
*8:00 a.m. Professor: Welcome to Calculus! Me: *NOPE* *Rapidly grabbed belongings and fleed the class like my life depended upon it…or like bats out of Hell, which is “equal to or greater than” Calculus.
*8:05 a.m. Destresses in Student Government office.
*8:30 a.m. Worked on editing New Orleans film documentary.
*9:00 a.m. Rush to my real math class. One of my LC students yells: “Hey, Steven!” I smiled, waved, and got bitchsmacked by the cold outside. But I made it to class on time. I sit down in the front of class. with the same professor from Calculus. In walks 4 of my students. *Damn* I love my students, but taking a class with them? What’s that saying? It doesn’t matter…
*9:30 a.m. Professor gives us a 5 question quiz. Open note, open book, and work with a partner he says. I fly solo. I aced it. *clenches fist like a boss*
*10:00 a.m. Student Government meeting. Our usual shenanigans.
*11:30 a.m. Rush to work, and another LC student stops me. One that holds a special place in my heart, they all do, but she’s different. She yells my name, and thought I didn’t know who she was. I quickly run back, give her a quick hug, and rush back to work.
*11:35 a.m. Give my best frannnnn aka Coryn Coleman her present. A present that claimed it was a key chain, but arrives as a necklace! EVEN BETTER!
*11:40 a.m. Work a Welcome Back table for our students that needed help finding their classes, and/or had questions. *Awkwardly sat there for an hour smiling at them while they questioned who I am and why I’m randomly sitting at an empty table.
*12:30 p.m. Grabbed lunch, and created signs for the table
*12:30 p.m. Returned to table with fancy signs in hand. Help a handful of students find their class. Realized the campus map for Founders Hall 1st Floor is a joke. It’s outdated, and doesn’t list all the rooms.
*12:45ish p.m. Inside-Out friends from last semester, Brittany and Carson, come to chat at the table, making it less awkward.
*1:15ish p.m. Melissa aka George stops by to chat about break.
*1:30 p.m. Raced from Founders to Warner to actually eat my lunch this time. Ran into three more of my LC students. Gave hugs, compliments, and went on my way.
*1:50 p.m. Ran into my 1st LC student from earlier, she asked where Hopewell 80 was…and I replied, clearly we’re taking classes together this semester…
*2:00 p.m. Listening to the professor of the course for School & Society (1 of 2 of my last classes that completes my Education Minor), I realized how much I really miss being an Education Major. I confirm mentally that my Master’s degree will definitely be in higher education in some capacity or another.
*2:30 p.m. Speak to Financial Aid about SAP Appeal, but they tell me I can’t do one until I file a FAFSA for 2016-2017.
*3:00 p.m. Back at the office for work. Another LC student pops in for a meeting. We chat about our breaks until my boss shows up.
*4:15 p.m. Boss shows up to see how things are going. We clean up and head back to the office.
*5:00 p.m. Pay Habitat for Humanity: Collegiate Challenge fee. Super excited to go on this trip to Georgia during Spring Break and help a family in need.
*5:15 p.m. Mental break.
*5:30 p.m. Start work on NOLA project, but couldn’t.
*6:00 p.m. Start homework.
*6:45 p.m. Meet roomy and head home.
*7:00 p.m. Home. Items from Wish App came! Also, an admissions packet for Seattle University Grad School arrived. Play with Romeo and Leiathetransgenderkitty.
*7:30 Stuck in a Twilight Zone of exhaustion. Did I really do that? No? Did I just hear a noice? Chill out, Steven…*slowly comes back to reality* Types this blog…
*8:00 p.m. Ready to flop on the floor like a fish out of water. Must. Have. Sleep. Instead, I read the admission’s packet.

…and remember, Go Bucks!

Help Me, Student Advocacy! You’re My Only Hope!

So many freshmen students come to campus confused. Confused on why they’re even there. Confused on what they want to do. Confused on what major to enroll in. Most of these students are traditional college age (17-19 years old). Some of these students are forced to go to college by parents who want their children to have a better life, and more opportunities. This is good and bad. This is good because the parents truly care for their children’s well-being. However it is also crippling their children by forcing them into a situation where they often have no prior experience, and lack the maturity and real-world experience to truly know what they want to do.

I am a non-traditional student, and I have changed my major three times; I recently added two minors to make my portfolio more full. (More on that later.) I often hear students complain what is the point of an advisor. Well, they are there for a reason, not just for academic decor. Yet, I encourage students to look at their Degree Audit. You can’t go wrong here. The D.A. tells every student what exact courses they have to take to complete their degree. It also breaks down the options for what electives can be used to fulfill requirements. Advisors do come into play. It is best to meet with your advisor to see what courses you plan on taking are actually being offered. *PLAN IN ADVANCE* Some courses are offered 1 or 2 times a year. If you miss one because of your schedule, emergency, etc. your advisor can help you plan on when you can take it again. You also need to meet with them if you are adding/changing major/minors, like I recently did. You can’t simply say, “Today I am changing to Biomedical Engineering and minoring in Star Wars History (That’s a joke!), but you get my point. Without meeting with your advisor to properly change your major/minor you will literally not be able to enroll in the courses you need to complete that major/minor.

Advisors help in a variety of other ways too. My suggestion is to schedule an appointment with your advisor at the beginning and the end of the semester, and anytime that you have an emergency or you’re confused. Oftentimes advisors have walk-in hours. These walk-ins are only for 10 minutes. So you have 10 minutes to ask your question and get an answer before the door hits you in the behind. It is wise when you do walk-ins to have a prepared list of your questions, and room to write their responses down. Keep it short and simple. Advisors have a lot on their plate that you don’t know about, because it’s simply none of your business.

So I mentioned that I recently added two minors. In Fall 2015 I added the Professional Writing Minor, and the Education Minor. I found out I was only two classes away from completing both minors. Since I am dependent on Financial Aid, I needed to maintain full time status (12 credits or more), adding one course per semester from each minor helped me reach that status. Thus enters my dilemma. In Fall 2015, my Financial Aid loans were nearing my maximum capacity. YES! There is a limit to how much you can borrow. I can now only receive my Pell Grant, and my SEOG Grant. These two grants cover most, but not all, of my tuition but leave about $1-2000 of tuition for me to pay out of pocket. Last semester, I was actually dropped from all of my classes because I didn’t have the funds to cover the remaining balance. *Enter Student Advocacy*

Thankfully our university has the Student Advocacy Center, which is located on Columbus campus. This office actually paid the remaining balance for me, re-registered all my courses, and dropped the late fee costs as well. As a senior who is only one year away from completing my degree, I was deemed a great candidate for this additional funding. I was informed that there might be a chance they could fund my remaining balance for Spring 2016. My tuition posted, my balance was paid, but left me with $1710.00 this semester to pay out of pocket.

I began working with Vocational Rehabilitation in December who thinks that I will be highly eligible for covering the costs of my remaining semester’s tuition/books. Tuesday I spoke with my case manager who informed me that she was just beginning my paperwork, and there would be no way to get my tuition paid for until Summer at the earliest. I had already contacted Student Advocacy to see if there was any chance that they could help again with the remaining balance. Wednesday afternoon I had an email that confirmed my remaining balance was paid for. I can’t express how big of a relief that was!

If you’re a student who might run into a similar situation, or you need someone who can fight for you to help you get closer to obtaining your degree, check out the OSU Student Advocacy Center at http://advocacy.osu.edu/

…and remember, Go Bucks!

 

College Pays You To Travel

Ever wanted to travel? Never left your city, county, state? Enroll in college now!

Thanks to the Study Abroad programs (& also the Office Of Outreach and Engagement, and campus jobs) through The Ohio State University, I have studied abroad in Berlin, Germany (July 1-31, 2012), Montreal/Ottawa/Quebec, Canada (May 2014), statewide conferences in Ohio (since 2010), Impact Conference Deland, Florida (2011), and frequent trips to New Orleans, Louisiana (2012-present).

January 29- Feb 3, 2016 I will be returning to New Orleans, fully paid for by campus, for the release of two documentaries my friends and I have filmed over those frequent trips. The local PBS station in New Orleans has decided to air our films, further spreading the importance of the Mardi Gras Indians and their cultural significance in local, national, and global capacities!

*stop* You might be saying. He’s lying. Nope, actually I am not. Depending on the actual course (study abroad) the entire cost can be covered by your tuition. Some study abroads might not cover all of your cost, however trips at my campus are absurdly lower than OSU Columbus campus trips. (Not transferring does have its perks…*lip smack*)

Another way to save from paying anything out of pocket is by applying for undergraduate research funds. *STOP* again you say? Chile, this research isn’t your traditional assigned research. If you already have an interest in doing something in the location…for example, the Eiffel Tower in Paris…you can apply for up to $1500.00 to cover costs from air fare, ground fare, housing, food, museum/bus/trolley passes, costs for printing your photos from the trip, and even for purchasing supplies (books, posters, trinkets, etc).

Now you’re talking, you say? College isn’t always about being in a classroom, it’s also about finding your future. I found my future by traveling. Where will yours be?

If you need help, or have questions…leave a little love in the comment box below and I will hook you up with the sweet deals that our campus has to offer.

…and remember, Go Bucks!

Intent to Pay, or Not To Pay Form

Good evening readers!

After a long day at work, and a filling dinner with friends, I sit here chicken-pecking this post for your benefit, and my frustration.

My boss informed me today of the “Intent to Pay Form”, which is a silly piece of paper that essentially says, “I agree to pay my tuition”. Said form, that I didn’t know existed, was due today, before the office closed.

How does a student know this form exists? Well, they don’t, unless it falls out of the academic sky above and bitch smacks you across the face…or, in my case, someone who cares about you and knows higher education bureaucracy informs you, like my boss.

The paper is one-sided, and simple to fill out. All you need is some basic info, check a box (or two), John Hancock and date that shit. No, wait, scratch that. You also need to attach proper documentation! Proper documentation? Why, what in blazes is that, you ask? I’m glad you asked. I asked, too! See conversation below:

Worker: Do you have documentation?

Me: Um, this paper. *mentally thinking, This paper doesn’t suffice to say that I promise to pay what I owe, because it is a form that says I will do just that. Right?*

W: Proper documentation of the scholarship you’ve been awarded.

M: I’ve been awarded a scholarship?

W: *sassy attitude begins*

M: *explains I am pending notification if I’ve been awarded funds via Vocational Rehabilitation, or not.

W: I will just write that on here, and turn it in. Check back with Fees & Deposits later tomorrow.

Me: Can I bring documentation tomorrow and then check back later in the day?

W: *eye brows raised, pursed lips, blank face* Mhm.

Moral of this Story: Pending

…and remember, Go Bucks!

Charisma in Progress

On Christmas Eve a date asked me out for some drinks, which escalated to a party at their friend’s.

We were all laughing, and I was having a great time with these new people I just met…until one of the guys said to me, “You know, you’re really snarky and you’ve been mean to me all night. You’ve been insulting us and very superior-like.”

*gasp* I was shocked and confused. I had to look to my side to see if he was talking to someone who must have slipped in unbeknownst to me. But there wasn’t. It was definitely me. I stuttered, “Me?”

I won’t bore you with the details, but I was mortified that I clearly was behaving so viciously to these strangers that I thought I was getting along with. *Imagine* Me, crying like a schoolgirl that some boy on the playground just ripped her babydoll away.

Confused, mortified, ashamed. I went home. I slept it off. Woke up, and slept it off even more. I was tramautized, still am, from this incident. I pride myself on trying to make others feel welcome, happy, special.

Rewind to the end-of-semester for our office evaluations. Some of my evaluations claimed I was “rude, but helpful”. (I am still trying to figure that one out.

Combining these two isolated incidents, I have been trying to improve myself. Pinpoint when my rampant sarcasm can be confused for meanness. Realize when I am not fully present. Mold myself into the person I envisioned myself to be prior to these events.

*Enter self-help book* I purchased The Charisma Myth, by Olivia Fox Cabone, for $1.00 in our campus bookstore. I read the first chapter Fall of 2015 and then the semester, work, life got in the way. Now that it is a new year, a chance for renewal, change, betterment I resumed the reading tonight.

“When you’re perceived as disingenuous, it’s virtually impossible to generate trust, rapport, or loyalty. And it’s impossible to be charismatic.” (Page 14)

The moral of the story: I don’t want to be the person people look at and feel that I can’t empathize, trust, or be approached. I want to be the person that people come to because they know I have their back, no judgements, no ulterior motives, no agendas. I want to be the Me that I thought I was, not the Me these people think I am.

…and remember, Go Bucks!

Hello Buckeye Friends & Family!

Welcome!

Thanks to the inspiration of my best friend Coryn Coleman, I have decided it is time to create this blog.

The name is a bit self-explanatory, but I can elaborate. On January 11, 2016 I will begin the first day of my final year at The Ohio State University at Newark.

Since Fall of 2010, I have been a student at Ohio State Newark. This is a beautiful, and close -knit campus. Over the years I have developed many friends, mentors, and opened up many doors for myself that I never once dreamed possible. One of these being my job as an Academic Coach for the Buckeye Generation Learning Community, and the Engineering Learning Community. I began the job as an Academic Coach in August of 2012, when I came home from studying abroad in Berlin, Germany for the entire month of July.

I didn’t know it then, but I quickly found out truly how much I enjoy working with first generation college students. I, myself, am a first gen student, as well as my coworkers, and the professors that our students have for classes.

As a first gen student, there are so many issues that we run into. As an upper classman, I help these students reach the same goal that I have…a college diploma.

This blog will be dedicated to the ups and downs of this final year at campus. The goal of this blog is to help under classmen/women and future college students see the first-hand experience from a student’s perspective. College isn’t easy, but it is worth it!

So stay tuned and follow me on my crazy journey to the day I have dreamed of since I was a child…the day that I cross the stage, shake the Dean’s hand, and accept the diploma that I have worked so hard to obtain, despite all the obstacles. If it can happen for me. It can happen for you!

…And remember, Go Bucks!!!!