Wow.. where do I start? This has been such a long year and such a fast year at the same time. I swear that I just got here and was helping move people in as an OWL. Yet I remember when I though the first semester was dragging and would never end. I got involved with some things right away. I joined boxing club, and I joined a traumatic brain injury club. I went to some other meetings as well, such as the equestrian team, but I thought I should start out slow. I dropped the boxing club because it really wasn’t what I was looking for, but I love my traumatic brain injury club (it’s called Life As We Know It or LAWKI for short), and I was elected its treasurer a short while ago. I just went to treasurer training yesterday, and I’m very excited to start my position. I’m also obviously involved in HSS, which my favorite part is getting the Newsletter with all the cool opportunities. I have also enjoyed going to some of the events. Also, my roommate is in HSS, and I love her, so I have to thank HSS for that. By far my favorite thing that I got involved in this year though has been my sorority. I never thought I would join a sorority, I really didn’t see myself as that kind of person. However, I went to one of the rush events with my friend, and I fell in love with it. It’s a specifically pre-health sorority. It’s called Delta Omega Kappa (or DOK for short). I absolutely love it. I’ve made 90+ new friends, and it’s a perfect mix of school and social. I now have social things to go to and do, but I also am surrounded by girls who understand how important and difficult school can be. I’m so thrilled with my decision to join DOK. I think it’s one of the best things I’ve done this year.
I’m not really sure what my expectations for this year were, but I think I met and didn’t meet them at the same time. I definitely met my expectations of how well I’ve done in school. Fall semester I got a 4.0 in Neuroscience, something I didn’t intend to do but am very proud that I did. This semester also looks good for grades as well so that’s a great feeling. I also surprised myself by meeting the best friends of my life. Everyone in my family told me I would meet my best friends in college, and they were right. My roommate, my friend from high school, and my new best friend from OSU are the closest I’ve ever been with any group of girls. They are amazing. We all love each other and are going to be together in a suite-style dorm next year. I literally can’t wait. We are going to all miss each other so much over the summer that we already have plans to get together multiple times. Some expectations that I didn’t meet were my expectations of how I would personally do in college. I’ve always been independent and responsible, so I didn’t think that the transition to college would be that hard for me. Boy was I wrong. It was so difficult. I hated it here for the majority of the first semester. The second semester has been better because I’ve focused more on my social life and being happy than school, but I still kill myself over school. I’ve had more breakdowns and panic attacks during this school year than I’ve ever had in my life. I definitely need to work on it. I need to work on being flexible, and not freaking out so much. I guess I just need to work on relaxing in general. Hopefully next year will be a lot better. I’ve heard from so many people that freshman year is the hardest, so I hope that they’re right.
I don’t think I’ve really had a “transformational” experience quite yet, but I think I’m close. I think college has opened my eyes to my weaknesses and what I need to work on in order to be okay on my own in the big world one day. Everyone in my family tells me college is more about how you grow as a person than what you learn in school, and I think they’re right, and I believe them, so I need to work on myself as a person more than school. I know how to do well in school, but I’m not doing well by myself, and I need to do better. My dad said that realizing I have a problem is the first step, and I think he’s right. So my goal for this summer and for the next school year is to work on my anxiety issues and keeping life in perspective. Life is so much more than school, and this year I have forgotten that many times.
Next year is going to be exciting, but I’m nervous at the same time. I think that I have decided to change my major to business. I’m currently Neuroscience and doing really well, but I’m just not sure that I want to be a doctor. I’ve never loved science. I’m good at it, but I don’t think I should do something just because I’m good at it. I want to love my job and be happy, not miserable. I know that to be a doctor is a lot of hard work and very intense, and I don’t think I’m that dedicated to being a doctor. It’s never been a dream of mine, so I’m following my heart here and taking a chance. It’s very scary to change majors, but I’ve scheduled all business classes for next semester and some G.E.s. I’m hoping it will help me figure some stuff out about myself. I know that I love to work with people, and I think the kind of work that I want to do with people may be more in the business aspect of life than the health field. I can totally picture myself running around in nice clothes going to meetings, conferences, driving around, managing people, working with other companies, solving problems.. I think it’s going to be great.
In the end, I’ve changed a lot this year. It’s sure been a bumpy ride, but I’m glad it happened. I have the best friends in the world, a club and a family (Delta Omega Kappa) to call my own, and countless memories. This year has been great, and I can’t wait for next year. I’m going to figure some stuff out, like my major and my anxiety, and I’m going to be living in a brand new dorm with my best friends. I can’t wait to see what the next year of my life has in store.